Dear Dad,
I love you, Dad, for all the things you did and for all the things you didn't do.
I forgive you, Dad, for all the things you did and all the things you didn't do.
Life wasn't totally kind to you, and I see that now and before your passing. I did see you as a human living for the first time, but it didn't make it any easier being your child because I never did get an answer or a reason why you were so cruel. It hasn't been easy being your daughter. You were a lot harder on me than you needed to be. You often made me feel like I was not loved, wanted, protected, valued & human. It wasn't easy watching you do the things you did to my siblings, and not being able to stop you or protect them.
You were a very complicated man, Dad, and I wish I could have really gotten to know you while you were on this planet despite yourself. I really do wish I had that opportunity, and I wish you had let me. But I do want to thank you for always being there for me when it counted the most, I guess. You always had an open-door policy, and we knew we were welcome to come over. We knew we'd regret it, but we knew we were always welcome. You were always available to talk, chat, or come to my rescue on the side of the road. Thank you for taking my baby and me in when I was 18 and didn't have a place to land. Thank you for being a good Grandfather to the majority of your Grandkids. I know the ones that got a chance to spend trauma-free time with you will miss you and cherish it.
I do love you, and I will miss you. I am trying hard to only remember the good things about you and what you've done in life. I want your memory to remain in such a positive light in my heart that I smile when I think of you.
Rest easy, Dad; your fight is finally over. I hope you found peace in Heaven that you couldn't find on Earth.
